The Peril of the Pick-Up Part 1 of 2
Addressing the problem. You must be tired, cuz you've been running through my mind all day. If you're looking for a
sure fire way to go home alone, use that line.
OK, now that we've gotten that out of the way, let's be honest . picking people up in a bar, club, restaurant (fill in
said place here) can be a tough gig. Each time, it's a new routine - there are no second takes and no chance for rehearsal.
When done correctly, a good first approach might get you a number, a date . it might even get you laid. Screw it up and
it's back to the corner with the Trekies and Bill Gates platinum fan club members.
It doesn't have to be like this. Your approach can be clean, concise and flawless every time. But first, one must
address the problem. And who better to assist in this than the victims - thousands of innocents out there tired of
hearing the same old line, fielding the same old grabs and having to endure one lame ass story after another.
For anyone who falls into this category, consider this your retribution. This is your chance to educate the world
on how you want to be approached. To everyone else, pay careful attention. This may just be your lucky day.
There's good attention and there's bad attention. It always pays to stand out in a crowd. But there's a huge difference
between getting people to notice you and getting people to strongly dislike you.
Looking for an example? Check this out.
"I was at a bar one night having a few drinks with some girlfriends," Jessica Y. from San Luis Obispo
explains. "This guy at the end of the bar had been eyeing me when all of a sudden, a napkin hit me in the
head. I ignored it, thinking I might have imagined it when another hit me in the nose. Turns out the guy had
written his number with a note that said, 'You know you want it.' I had the bartender put our drinks on his tab
and we took off."
Being yourself is always better than being someone else Are you a supermarket bagger trying to pose as a lawyer?
A pre-school teacher who thinks a push-up bra and the name Sunny will get you more attention? For a quickie,
maybe - but heed this warning.
A good gig is hard to follow, and should your first encounter lead to another couple of dates, a life for Sunny
will suddenly have to materialize. Teams of soap opera writers can't keep track of their character's histories -
what makes you think you'll fair any better?
Sleazy is never sexy. As a general rule, avoid use of words you might find in a copy of Hustler.
"I'll never forget this time I was vacationing in Vegas and a guy came up to me and said, 'Nice tits, are
you a stripper?' Stephanie G. from Phoenix laughs. "OK, I understand it's Vegas, but that's never good
news."
And though girls may fair better with some guys, generally speaking, they won't get much further. If tits, ass
and stripper are off limits, the so too should the words dick, cock and pimp.
There's no such thing as a good line Unless it comes from the heart and is spur of the moment,
you are going to screw it up. End of story.
I like your eyes, your smile, your hair . we know. You wouldn't be crafting a pick-up if you weren't interested.
And as for quoting a movie, try again.
"This guy actually approached me with, 'Of all the bars in all the worlds, you had to walk into this
one,'" Sharisse R. from New Orleans says. "I can't help but wonder where he though he was going
with that line."
Come as you are. don't send a friend. Whoever dreamed up the idea that third party hook-ups
were the sure-fire way to avoid rejection, think again. More often than not, if you send a friend to do the
talking, they're the one who's going to get the phone number - not you.
"The minute I hear someone say, ' My friend thinks you're cute,' I shut down," Todd G. from San
Francisco says. "If she thinks I'm so cute, why the hell are you here and not her."
Depressed yet? Whoever though there'd be so many ways to screw up a 30 second time block?
Fear not. We wouldn't leave you hanging . so of course; we've mapped out the solution to these problems
for you.
For the answer to your pick up prayers, see "Part Two of Two: Perfecting Your
Pick-up."
Top